Review:
The Tug Fork River Band hails from Indianapolis, IN and they represent the last of the trilogy of Wounded Records albums I received in my latest pile of reviews. Their debut record is entitled Catch For Us The Metal.
It was a weird revelation when I figured out this band was a Christian outing. Judging from the combination of the band name and the album cover which looks like a photo from a local Klan lynching, I expected this to be an ultra racist southern rock album. Then I noticed song titles like “Bad Intentions For A Billy Goat”, “Canadian Geese Ain’t “Merican”, “Pound, Explode, Pound Pound, Explode”, and “Duct Tape Fixes Errthing”. So my expectations went from racism to a redneck incest orgy. The only thing I hoped for was that this band was simply meant as a parody and was going to be joking about all the stereotypes of the Midwest and the South.
Let’s just say I was way off. Most the lyrical content focuses on the praising the good lord and related topics such as the young Muslim girl who converted to Christianity. It was much different than the Johnny Rebel inspired nonsense I was expecting. I couldn’t help but feel a little let down because I was really anticipating a good laugh. What’s even sadder about the lyrical content is that they really are elementary in nature. Although I’m not Christian myself I can get behind a Christian band if they can convey their message in a well thought out nature. This band seems to try to hard to make each line rhyme and the lyrics are nearly laughable at times.
The lyrical content isn’t even close to being the worst aspect of this band though. Although I’m going to try my best, I don’t think I’m going to be able to find the words that correctly describe my experience. God awful is an easy way to sum up this band. And I apologize for that cheap pun. Musically they try to mesh Southern Rock with Heavy Metal and spice it up with the occasional metalcore chug filled breakdown. However they can’t perform any of these elements correctly without sounding like this was the first time they have ever played their instruments. Then just when I thought it could get no worse the clean vocalist kicks in and we are delivered something that resembles the latest Nickelback records but even they can write something cohesively that doesn’t sound like a record that it wasn’t thrown together by a bunch of amateurs in the period of a few days.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m all for individuals forming bands and creating their own original music. Even though all of the bands I were in from years ago were nothing to write home about, as a music enthusiast there wasn’t anything more rewarding than to write and perform my own material. What I don’t get is how a band that is obviously lacking talent signed to a label when they should just be playing the open mic night at their local bar? For the 3rd time I really have to question Wounded Records and their decision making when it comes to signing talent. I’ve been delivered 3 bands so far that all sound completely different and all of them, in my opinion, have been terrible. With the exception of Solemn Vow, I don’t see this label making any kind of bank on their releases. I understand they are trying to push the Christian message but they’d be better of doing it with bands that can actually perform and sell records.
This really is one of the worst records I’ve had to review in a long time. I thought the Neviah Nevi album I reviewed a few days ago was in the running for the crown but this record just ran it over with a John Deere tractor (atleast I can do some hick humor). I don’t recommend this for anyone unless you want to see what not to do.
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