passing a drug test 40 replies, 2579 views

baconanddrugs
10/28/2009 6:45:00 PM
I'm getting a side job for the winter that requires me to pass a piss test, I smoke weed pretty regularly so i'm wondering if anyone can reccomend a detox drink or something to clear it out...I know your supposed to drink tons of water and shit as well but i'm wondering if anyone can reccomend a specific product that worked for them. Thanks.
sherman
10/28/2009 6:48:00 PM
click here for link

I used this stuff close to 7 years ago when I had to take a drug test for a government job. Worked like a charm but I almost puked a million times while drinking it.
tyrod24
10/28/2009 6:59:00 PM
just work out and drink a bunch of water and cranberry juice
$teve grove
10/28/2009 7:00:00 PM
there are only two ways to 100% pass a drug test, one of which isn't very helpful:

1) don't do drugs (NOT A VIABLE OPTION)
2) buy a wizzinator, all the cleanse products are a gamble.
bathtub_shitter
10/28/2009 7:03:00 PM
Certo is Gold!
manbearpig
10/28/2009 7:05:00 PM
Originally posted by:tyrod24

just work out and drink a bunch of water and cranberry juice

this.
baconanddrugs
10/28/2009 7:19:00 PM
Originally posted by:Hymen Holocaust

if you are fat you are fucked , nothing will work. dilute , dilute , dilute , dilute , dilute. drink as many diaretics as you can like tea and cranberry juice . make sure you piss atleast once before you take the test and piss for as long as you can before putting piss in the cup . so piss and catch the end stream of your piss. drink 1 gallon of water upto 3 hours before the test . dilution , fat and freq of use are the factors in passing or failing a test .

Well that sucks, luckily I have a pretty good amount of time so I think i'm gonna do the detox kit sherman reccomended since they make one that is technically for heavier people coupled with working out a little more and drinking tons of water and cranberry juice.
k-diddy
10/28/2009 7:33:00 PM
quick fix...synthetic urine best invention ever
baconanddrugs
10/28/2009 7:35:00 PM
Originally posted by:WEBOTHLOSE

quick fix...synthetic urine best invention ever

Does this shit actually work i'm way more sketched out about this than trying to cleanse my system. i'm a bigger dude but i'm not an insanely heavy smoker.
$teve grove
10/28/2009 7:38:00 PM
Originally posted by: WEBOTHLOSE

quick fix...synthetic urine best invention ever

this. seriously, i've passed and failed drug tests using different cleanse products. the only fool-proof way is fake piss or don't smoke.
baconanddrugs
10/28/2009 7:40:00 PM
well i've stopped smoking for the time being but i'm gonna take the test in probably a week or so. They really make a synthetic piss that can't be recognized by a test? do I need one of those fake bladder jawns?
$teve grove
10/28/2009 7:43:00 PM
thats what i was saying about the wizzinator, its a fake bladder/cock that when you add water to the powder it turns into piss. all i know is i drank a gallons of water and didn't smoke for a week and failed. i drank some cleanse product(s) and i failed. the synthetic piss kept me out of jail. and it comes in 3 colors, black, brown and white.
$teve grove
10/28/2009 7:43:00 PM
*the cock, not the piss that is
tyrod24
10/28/2009 7:47:00 PM
Originally posted by: DICKLORD BONE


BEERZEBUB
10/28/2009 7:48:00 PM
The dilution method: click here for link

OR

the substitution method (best if the situation allows it): click here for link
BEERZEBUB
10/28/2009 7:52:00 PM
and do not waste your money on any ridiculous detox products because that's just what they are: a waste of your money. If you're a regular smoker then you'd most likely have to quit entirely for at LEAST a month or two, probably more, to get the shit out of your system. If you know how the test is going to work and whether or not you'll be alone. Substituting your piss is the foolproof best option.
k-diddy
10/28/2009 7:56:00 PM
quick fix worked for me multiple times no bullshit...its like 20 bucks def worth it
baconanddrugs
10/28/2009 8:23:00 PM
didn't realize this was going to be such and endeavour I know people who claim to have used those detox drinks before and they worked fine.
rumorhasit
10/28/2009 8:27:00 PM
alot of jobs will not only require a piss test OR if your job is really good, a hair sample.

AND.. *drum roll* they also take some of the urine to do an 'aldulterant' test.. that brings up the shit you are trying to take to hide your druggie habbit..

Good luck with that!
rumorhasit
10/28/2009 8:29:00 PM
P.S. take up coke.. its out of your system a lot faster.
tyrod24
10/28/2009 8:30:00 PM
Originally posted by: rumorhasit

P.S. take up coke.. its out of your system a lot faster.

$$$
rumorhasit
10/28/2009 8:33:00 PM
actually.. I have an idea for you..
you can buy over the counter urine drug tests at any pharmacy now. They are just as good as what a job will test you with AND you will see immediate results. worst case, take the test and if its positive, tell them you have the flu and need to reschedule..
Droc
10/28/2009 8:38:00 PM
Originally posted by: rumorhasit

actually.. I have an idea for you..
you can buy over the counter urine drug tests at any pharmacy now. They are just as good as what a job will test you with AND you will see immediate results. worst case, take the test and if its positive, tell them you have the flu and need to reschedule..

good idea

keep taking them until your clean. detox really does suck, because most employers or people giving the piss test are up on it and look for those things. and even the substituting stuff can fuck you up if you don't do it right. If you do substituting make sure it's warm or your fucked.
rumorhasit
10/28/2009 8:41:00 PM
I take urine at my job for drug tests.. We have a little sticker that measures the temperature on the urine cup.. if its below 94 degree's we know that they are using a fake pisser..
baconanddrugs
10/28/2009 8:41:00 PM
I'm just gonna stop smoking for two weeks, do a detox, drink lots of water and hope for the best...I don't full on need the job so I suppose if I failed it wouldn't be the end of the world. Fucking sucks that it is this complicated but i'm not about to spend $160.00 on some fake cock device filled with synthetic piss. I will post my results when I have them.

tyrod24
10/28/2009 8:41:00 PM
sweat balls